Millie Poutama shares her WOW Factor Story for Perinatal Mental Health Week

Millie Poutama was a keen surfer until she suffered from debilitation post natal anxiety

Words: Millie Poutama

I am a mother of one and live in an off-grid house with my wife on the Central Coast. I was a keen surfer before I became pregnant, but following the birth of my first child I suffered from debilitating postnatal anxiety.

I have always been such a happy-go-lucky person, I have never had any mental health issues before, so I was completely blindsided after my son was born and I developed postnatal anxiety. It might sound dramatic, but I was convinced that my son would die. I would set an alarm clock on the hour every hour to check he was okay in his sleep, which meant of course I didn't sleep for almost a year. I was terrified to leave the house and couldn't drive a car because I used to have the most intense intrusive thoughts, that almost felt like premonitions that I would crash and my family wouldn't survive. My son turns two this week, but even now I get incredibly anxious if I have to be away from him for more than a few hours.

I knew that surfing was something that had always helped with my mental health and that it was something I needed to get back into so I joined the waitlist for a WOW program.

I was most excited about rekindling my love of surfing but was surprised that the best part of the program was actually the connection with other participants and the friendships I made. There was something special about the group of women in our program. I can't quite put my finger on it, but we joined as total strangers who left as friends. Everyone was so open and vulnerable, the safe space that was created was really something magic. I completed the program over a month ago, we have a WhatsApp group that we chat in almost daily and everyone still surfs most weeks.

For me, the transition back into surfing has really helped with my anxiety and outlook for the future. I completed my program during the month of Ducktober, which if you are not familiar, is WOW’s cold water fundraising challenge which encourages a daily “duck” in cold water. So suddenly I went from not spending much time in the ocean at all, to surfing weekly and swimming in the ocean daily. The difference in my mental health, overall fitness and self-esteem has been incredible. I am still anxious, but I know that I have coping methods available to me that help. The WOW program has changed my life for the better both in a personal and professional manner, and I would recommend the program to anyone. 

I cannot express how amazing the program is, I really believe that it has the capacity to change lives and in some cases save lives.

Now that I have joined the WOW team as the Social Media and Content creator  I feel even more fired up to work in a role that will help people with their mental health, after suffering for the first time so acutely with my own.